I have a confession. I am human. At first, I thought I was a hypocrite. That is a strong word, but, when it comes to talking to myself, maybe, somewhat, I am.
My boyfriend and I have an agreement. For every 10 pounds that I lose, he will order me a new band for my Apple Watch (because I'm a colorful person and want one of each color.) I got on the scale earlier this week, and I proclaimed to him that he should go ahead and order one, because I was going to hit 30 pounds at weigh-in on Saturday. Not only was that a significant 10 pound loss, but 30 pounds would mean that I was halfway to goal.
Well, it's Saturday. It's weigh-in day. I got on the scale first thing this morning, and I was doubtful that I would hit the goal. Tears welled up in my eyes. The disappointment was there. Well, the disappointment got worse. I got to weigh-in. I needed the scale to say 160.4 or below. I looked and the scale had 160.4, and quickly jumped to 160.6. I had missed my 30 pounds and "halfway to goal" by a mere .2 ounces. I was soooooo close. I was angry. I was upset. I held it together through the meeting, but when I got to my car, I sat in the parking lot and cried, and cried, and cried. (I think I would have been less disappointed with a being a half of a pound, or more away from hitting that mark, than I was from being so close.) I had told myself I would hit the goal, and I believed it. I had told my boyfriend, and he believed it. As I sat there and cried, I was posting on Facebook, and texting friends.
Also, for the first time since I began this journey, I wanted to eat my feelings. I wanted to go pig out! I wanted to eat all of the things that I had given up, until I reached goal. I didn't do that. I did make the decision to go home, and make healthy choices. I'm so glad that I did listen to myself, in that regard!
Someone brought it to my attention, that, if this had happened to someone else, I would have turned it into something positive. I would have told them that a loss, is a loss, and that they should be proud of all of the hard work that they had put in, and all that they had accomplished. I would have told them to keep their head up, because next week would be the week it happened for them, and that it would be a big celebration.
Also, for the first time since I began this journey, I wanted to eat my feelings. I wanted to go pig out! I wanted to eat all of the things that I had given up, until I reached goal. I didn't do that. I did make the decision to go home, and make healthy choices. I'm so glad that I did listen to myself, in that regard!
Someone brought it to my attention, that, if this had happened to someone else, I would have turned it into something positive. I would have told them that a loss, is a loss, and that they should be proud of all of the hard work that they had put in, and all that they had accomplished. I would have told them to keep their head up, because next week would be the week it happened for them, and that it would be a big celebration.
How true that is. I am so thankful to the person that brought this to my attention. I am positive for everyone else. I cheer for everyone. I try to make everyone feel good about themselves. Well, now, I'm not only angry about not hitting the goal, but I am angry that I got so upset ,and that I cried. I know better than to talk to myself this way. I know how detrimental negative self-talk can be. I know that I should celebrate the loss, and be proud of myself for coming as far as I have. I should be proud of all of the hard work that I have put in, to get to this point.
I hope that others don't think that I take their situations lightly, when they suffer disappointments, because I don't. I know that they are upset, and my true intent is to always lift others up. I don't want anyone to be down, but I definitely realize, especially after today, how a disappointment can be devastating, and that I will never take anyone's feelings for granted.
Thank you to those who posted positive replies to my posts, and who texted me only positive, and encouraging words. I truly hope that I don't come across as hypocritical. I only hope that everyone can see, that I am only human. I get down, too. I am hard on myself, and disappointments sit hard with me, especially if I feel that I have failed, or let myself down.
I hope that this message reaches others who are suffering from disappointments. I want them to see that they are not alone, especially if they are feeling the way that I am feeling today. I want everyone to know, and feel, that they, too, are only human!
Always remember – YOU ARE AWESOME! Go out and make it a great day!
**If you like this post, please feel free to share it, or to share the link to the blog! It is with your help that I may reach, and inspire others! I welcome comments! I welcome suggestions! If you wish to contact me privately, email me at lisaspointofview@gmail.com .
Thank you for your support !
Great post Lisa!!! Sometimes it's good to actually see that others are "human." You'll get there doll. You know you will too.
ReplyDeleteAs Scarlet said, "Tomorrow is another day." 😉
Thank you, so much. I'm so glad you enjoyed reading this. I'm in a better frame of mind now, and know that I will hit this goal at my next weigh-in. If not, well, I think I will be more than a little upset! LOL. Again, I appreciate you reading, and hope you will check out other posts, in the future!
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