Why Do You Want Me To Fail?

What happens when your significant other doesn't support you in your journey?  What happens when their words and actions hurt?  What happens when you feel like your friends don't support you, and want you to fail?  Do you think about quitting because it is just easier than dealing with the hurt, and lack of support? 

 

What is wrong with people?  Friends and significant others are supposed to love you and support you, so why don't they?  People in general, (not all people, but many) are mean, selfish, and belittling to others.  They want to bring others down, and they work hard at doing this.  It makes some people feel bigger to bring others down.  When you are in this situation, it is hard to see.  The problem is not you!  The problem is them!  Some people are just miserable in their own lives, and they try to reflect it on other people, when they should be taking a good look at themselves!  People who love you and care about you, should support you on your journey.  So, why don't they?  Is it fear of the unknown?  Is it insecurity?  Are you trying to accomplish something that they, themselves, have not been able to accomplish?

 

I'm relate this to the weight loss journey, because these are the examples that have led me to write this.

 

When I first told a friend that I was joining Weight Watchers, instead of a positive response, I was asked "Why do you want to torture yourself like that?"  This comment really bothered me.  This was someone that I thought would think this was a great thing, and support me.  I wasn't expecting that comment at all!  It actually pissed me off, to put it mildly. 

 

I have friends who are being told by their significant others, that they are fat; that their significant other is no longer attracted to them.  How horrible this is to hear?   Do they say this, hoping that it will motivate you to change?  Is it well-intentioned, although hurtful?  Does it just make them feel better, or bigger, to put you down?  Will you ever know why?

 

What happens when you start succeeding on the journey, and you start to look better and feel better?  Most of us, I would imagine, can't wait to buy new clothes, to get a new haircut, a manicure or pedicure - because we are starting to feel good about ourselves!   We should do this!  Many of us have been down for so long, and we deserve to feel good!  So, what happens when you get home, and you are told that you don't need to be wearing those clothes?  They show too much skin, they are too tight, when, in fact, they are not.  They are flattering, and they make you feel good!  I'm sure most of us don't lose a few pounds and run out to buy clothes that one would wear to stand on a street corner, or dance on a pole!  We just want to feel like we look good.  Are they telling you this because they are used to you being in the shadows, and they don't want you to step into the light?  Have you worn clothes before that "hid" you, and kept you from being noticed, and now, you have something colorful that draws a little bit of attention to you? 

 

What if you have been told by your significant other that they want you to quit?   I would only guess that this person is extremely insecure, and can't stand the thought of anyone else paying attention to you!  It's sad!  They should want you to feel good about yourself!  They should want you to take care of yourself!  But, they don't.

 

Quitting and failure are options.  If you quit or fail, nothing changes.  Some people don't like change.  Some people may fear that a positive change for you, may have a negative impact on them. 

 

All I can say, is that there is no better time than now, to do this for yourself!  Don't let the insecurity of others, stop you or make you stumble on your journey!  Prove them all wrong!  You are strong!  You are beautiful!  You deserve to step out of the shadows, and into the light!  You deserve to feel good about yourself, and the person that you are becoming!  You were born to shine!  Being the best person you can be is the best gift you can give yourself, and it also is the best gift you can give to others!

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Thank you for your support !